noooooooogie!!!!!!!

When I was younger I was even weirder then I am now. Me and Shauna had huge imaginations, and were lucky enough to have equally weird parents who encouraged us to be as free spirited as we wanted. Shauna was missing her 2 front teeth for most of elementary school, since her older sister pushed her off a stool and they got knocked out. One day we were walking home from school, we must have been 8 or 9 and we passed by the local park. We saw a man with a shovel burying something and though this memory is vague,for some reason the scene was cool enough to make us want to go back there with my Dad and dig up what the man had buried. What we uncovered is to this day, the most bizarre items our nimble hands could have found. 2 voodoo dolls,one blue and one yellow. They were tied together back to back with 2 slices of apple in between them. There were also 2 pictures of young women with creole writing on the back of them. My Dad wouldn't let us touch them and instead prodded them with his shovel. Out came a thick, yellow liquid as my Dad swiftly flung the dolls into the flowing River. We shall never know who those women were or what the dolls truly represented, but a small part of me fears that because we messed with the ritual, we have a certain voodoo curse upon us! Shauna also wore black converses every day. When She came to Upper Nyack Elementary school she brought along a new fad. Everywhere you turned kids started singing "stop! in the naaame of loove", because Shauna had introduced my class to it. Once we made a short film entitled "hell in a nut shell." All I remember is Shauna played a jealous ex boyfriend and wore a disgusting wig that looked like Liza Minnelli after a night of fucking a muppet. We took acting classes with an emotionally unstable wide hipped women name Vicki. She shook her ass violently once at a Siggelkow Christmas party while her husband played Beatles songs on the piano. We used to go to Temptations after school and Shauna used to always order the pasta of the day and it was always the same. Plain shells with butter. The coolest thing about us though was our love for the Chronicles of Narnia. Not the books, but the cheap and horribly made 80's movie version. People were dressed up as the beavers. They wore furry costumes and Lucy had buck teeth and there was Turkish Delight as far as the eye could see. Mounds and mounds of it. Piled high like a CIA satellite dish, hitting the stars but going right through them.

strokes for folks

jingle jangle baby, jingle jangle! I like to picture a homeless black man dressed as Santa Claus, holding a little Christmas bell and shaking it in children's faces, his eyes yellow and vacant from cirrhosis and general insanity. Each child that walks by gets a special treat when said homeless man shouts JINGLE JANGLE BABY, JINGLE JANGLE!!, furiously rocking the bell back and forth, holding out a paper cup that says "Jesus loves the homeless."
I feel really good about my life right now, but I'm terrified of the future in ways I never thought imaginable. I'm afraid of everything from never getting married to running out of fresh water and crops. It's so hard to relax and live in the moment, no matter how much I know it's the healthiest and most fulfilling way to live. Of course, we all as humans have a general fear of the unknown...but when does it become obsessive and damaging? I once heard that roughly 95% of thought is either fear about the past or the future. Think about it..how often does a thought pass through your head that pertains to now. right now. right right now. I feel like my mind is constantly rotting and ripening, shifting every second to a different plane of time,a different mentality, choosing it's shape. If I was a romance novel writer my pen name would be "Isabel Rose."

sinus infection,magic mushrooms,foot acne

"it's raining men yea but we don't give a fuck
you won't see me out there with a rubber duck"
(sneak preview of me and Christina's future hit single "it's raining men")

music,music everywhere and not a drop to drink. This is how I've been feeling lately. Like musically I'm completely out of the game and letting less talented and more obnoxious girls take my place. it is of course, my fault. I could have easily pursued singing and kept it as a hobby but uhhh I started smoking massive amounts of marijuana? Either way, I've let this passion go for the time being but it still hurts to hear a tone deaf bitch sing a song I could harmonize to perfectly. Kind of pretentious I know...but fuck it, it's my blog and I shall write anything I choose! I had a great weekend...got to chill with some old time buddies from Nam, my fantastic Father and even Jake came from the rural confines of Brooklyn. I had it all Peg, ya shoulda seen me out there, dancing,spinning, like a dreidel on the first night of Hanukkah..These old gams of mine used to pay the rent in tips alone. Either way you look at it,Burt Reynolds had a great mustache and a hell of a career. And thats why, thats really why..Rosie will never be sexually attractive, even to the Queen herself,Jodie Foster. Have you ever thought about sex as the only way to physically connect yourself to someone? If you have not you should not if you should not you always should and if you have then...shit.

who is the real Jose Luiz?

When I sit on the subway I like to look at Womens hands and see who's wearing a wedding and/or engagement ring. I often have to mentally picture my body turned towards theirs, so I can figure out if the ring is indeed on their left hand and they are betrothed. Jose Luiz (aka our good friend Ed) brought up a good thought. "Human behavioral patterns around puddles:" Who jumps, who glances at it and tries to get around, who dives right into the watery mess. I try to live my life constantly studying anthropology and it's turned riding the subway into a funded liberal organizations way of dissecting the human condition. The man with the tattoo on his face, the girl with huge lips smeared in red, the abusive ghetto ass mom trying to quietly smack her kids. The shit I've learned about humans from the subway alone calls for a celebration.
1) Everyone is slightly hurt when a person sitting next to them jumps up at the first sign of another vacant seat
2) Some couples choose to be really sexual in front of everyone. Mostly they are young Latinos.
3) I always feel really weird and sad when beggers get on the train and there are little kids around just watching them, confused.
4) The meaning of molestation has drastically changed in my book, or else I guess I get molested a little every day by whatever black man stands directly behind me on the 4/5.
5) ooooh girllll shock me like an electric eel! Babyguuurl, turn me on with your electric feel!

puedo hablar con tizan por favor

My life is a blur of Massage school,blunts,friends and incredible sex. I feel totally unfulfilled and lazy, I feel totally complete and incredibly joyous. I'm in such an exiting and exhilarating part of my life. I feel so much existential angst and yet as a person I feel my life is pretty fucking sweet. Every day I try to pick apart the beautiful parts of my existence and surroundings and not take things for granted. Easier said then done, but yet by even being aware of this goal I am accomplishing it. I'm so proud and lucky to have amazing people in my life and I am reminded of this every day when I receive text messages such as "find your panties and get the fuck outta my truuuck." Basically, I couldn't be more content with my environment and outside influence. It's only my head that needs guidance...eh, maybe that never changes.